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30 October 2008 @ 03:35 pm
Bookshop hilarity is hilarious  
Old lady: I want a book on the Louvre
Me: Wonderful, we have many art books for you to peruse, I'm sure you'll find one you like -
Old impatient lady: We just got back from Paris
Me: Lucky!
Old and quite possibly insane old lady: Yeah, the Louvre was great, but we were so disappointed in the gift shop - we wanted to buy a book about all the art we'd just seen, but couldn't get one because they were all in French. Can you believe that??
Me: ...
Me: *blink blink*
Me: Let me show you were the art books are...

Then there are the people who come into the shop, not knowing the author or title of the book, or even the genre or subject they're looking for, and expect us to know what the hell they want. I can only assume by MAGIC. And if I had magic powers, I sure as hell wouldn't be wasting them on finding shitty romance novels and mass market thrillers. Srsly.

A woman came in today asking for 'some sort of Frankenstein book' for her son, by 'Mary somebody, I guess....' I WEEP FOR HUMANITY.

My favourite, however, is the lady who came in yesterday, again not knowing what she was looking for (at all) - she knew beyond a doubt the author's name was Elizabeth Case, and when I couldn't find her in the computer we spent nearly two hours roaming around the store (I did of course leave to help people with real books to find, but because I am So Nice I kept coming back to help my crazy person, plus I crave a challenge ;-). We searched in vain, because, of course, the author Elizabeth Case did not exist. Guess the real name of the author she was looking for. Go on, guess. You never will. :) After countless 'are you SURE that's her actual name, not Libby Cass or any variant of Elizabeth Case imaginable?' and her annoyed replies that YES OF COURSE that's her name and being cross at me for daring to suggest she could be wrong...the author she was actually looking for was, in fact, Kate Atkinson. Which TOTALLY sounds like Elizabeth Case, I'm sure you will agree. *rolls eyes and sighs* So hilariously, epically wrong. Sheesh.

In other news, I am ridiculously smitten with Supernatural (and especially those utterly adorkable J2 boys). Bweeeeeeeeee. :)
The Muppets
Annundriel: [misc] In the Rapid Autumn of Librariesannundriel on October 30th, 2008 10:47 pm (UTC)
I run into the same problem at the libraries I work at. They just expect me to know every book of every series on every subject. Oi. But I do like influence kids in their books choices.

My favorite time, though, is when people bring in romance novel donations. (I think my favorite donated title so far has been Forbidden: The Billionaire's Virgin Princess.) We have a rotating rack for those that the regular librarian calls "the burning ring of fire."
Neverwhere: Visions and Revisions [inspiration/tea]angelislington on October 30th, 2008 11:29 pm (UTC)
HAHAHAAAAA unfortunately I know the romance 'novel' of which you speak :D (That series is so brilliant, I love things like 'The Italian Count's Secret Bride' and 'Wanted: The Mighty Stallion's Forbidden Rendezvous' LOL)

Every morning I remind myself to make a post with our amaaaaaaaaaaazing romance titles, and every day I forget to do so. *giggles*
a.k.a. Katie: troublesoupytwist on October 30th, 2008 10:49 pm (UTC)
Man, dealing with the public sucks. *hugs a lot*

Meggytron: Jared... um... yeah.diner on October 31st, 2008 12:12 am (UTC)
Neverwhere: Gay Boys in Bondage [python/shakespeare]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 01:32 am (UTC)
Meggytron: Dean yessssssdiner on October 31st, 2008 04:00 pm (UTC)
Neverwhere: I'm soooooo awwwwwsomeangelislington on October 31st, 2008 06:10 pm (UTC)
That articulate statement conveys my feelings as well. ;-)
Neverwhere: BWEEEEEE [python/giddysquee]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 01:31 am (UTC)

god yes, Winchesters really do make EVERYTHING so much better. SAVE ME SAM AND DEAAAAAAN :D

*squishes you tight*
a.k.a. Katie: on the way to theresoupytwist on October 31st, 2008 01:38 am (UTC)
Dude, if the Winchesters do come and save you, I demand you point them my way next! XD

(Though I sekritly fancy Jared and Jensen more. Jensen and Dean are tied for me, but Jared beats Sam SO HARD. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmjared. I would so climb that tree. LOL.)

*squishes back*
Neverwhere: Picard is Pimpin' [star trek/smex]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 01:41 am (UTC)

I think you'd have to duel to the death with diner climbing privileges of THAT tree. *smirk* ;-)

Jared pwns Sammypants hardcore. ALL MUST LOVE THE PUPPY AND DESPAIR. *giggles*
Meggytron: J&J YESdiner on October 31st, 2008 04:02 pm (UTC)
Meggytron: Jared + panda = EEEEEEEEEdiner on October 31st, 2008 04:01 pm (UTC)

I so love Jensen and Jared more than Dean and Sam. Although Dean's a hot son of a bitch. ;-)

But goofy dorks? SO MADE OF HOT WIN!!!!!
winterswitchery on October 30th, 2008 11:04 pm (UTC)
When I worked in electronics, my favourite was when people would come in and ask for a cd by a certain artist. No name no idea of the title, yet totally dependent on the hope that I listened to shitty radio stations as much as they did.

The crowning idiotic moment was when they began to hum it for me so I'd recognize it.
Neverwhere: *wink* [Schmendrick is love]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:41 am (UTC)
*chuckles* I hope the customer's embarrassment at having to hum in front of everyone made up for your extreme annoyance. *grins* (A little bit, anyway. ;-)

It really is astounding how people will automatically confirm the most magical powers of omniscience and telepathy on retail workers, while simultaneously treating them like absolute shit. :)
sheldrakesheldrake on October 30th, 2008 11:22 pm (UTC)
Can you believe those French people, eh? Honestly!

Some of my favourite bookshop customers included Ms. "I'm leaving the country if Labour get in again, no really, I swear I will, and I'm telling you this because?" and Mr. "Here's my Christmas list, now you just run off and find me all the books and I'll wait here".
Neverwhere: History is Awesome! [classics/geekery]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:44 am (UTC)

Hehehe the election is next week, I'm sure you can imagine the similar irrelevant political diatribes I'm experiencing right now. ;-)

And YES everyone does just expect you to do the work for them. Especially when they don't actually SAY what they want. Yeeesh.
Meggytron: Airplane // why did I quit drinking?diner on October 31st, 2008 12:12 am (UTC)
Hmmm... I've always wanted to work in a bookstore but now I'm afeared.
Neverwhere: JayneHat of Happiness! [firefly/cute]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:46 am (UTC)
It's not sooooooo bad, honestly.


It just truly is fascinating how dumb people can be. Even when they're in a bookshop. :)
Ashfaeashfae on October 31st, 2008 03:58 pm (UTC)
Oh man, what's with the obsession with that book? MAKE THEM READ SUNSHINE BY ROBIN MCKINLEY INSTEAD perhaps it will cure them.
Neverwhere: Cheeky Monkey [schmendrick/naughty]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:50 pm (UTC)
I was HORRIFIED to discover someone had shelved Sunshine in the Romance section, hidden behind The Highlander's Sassy Virgin Maid or some such nonsense. :/

I've been wondering what I could give clueless idiots who for some reason have been brainwashed into thinking Twatlight is an acceptable series...thank you for the recommendation! I should probably read it too, huh. ;-)
Meggytron: Rob Teefdiner on October 31st, 2008 03:59 pm (UTC)
Neverwhere: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO [tennant/spaz]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:51 pm (UTC)

*sobs copiously*
Meggytron: Jensen is such a goofdiner on October 31st, 2008 12:13 am (UTC)
I'm BEYOND obsessed with those hunks.
hee hee i said hunk
Neverwhere: Bestest Friends! [spn/geeklove]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:46 am (UTC)
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo really? COLOUR ME STUNNED :-P
Meggytrondiner on October 31st, 2008 03:59 pm (UTC)
Neverwhere: All Mirth and No Matterangelislington on October 31st, 2008 05:57 pm (UTC)
I love eeeet :D

Or rather, I love the idea of it - I wish you could see their faces better, but it's still a cute icon. :)
Meggytron: JARED the partierdiner on October 31st, 2008 06:01 pm (UTC)
I still know who they are and that's ALL THAT MATTERS
Neverwhere: Amused Lizzie -- by eyesthatslayangelislington on October 31st, 2008 06:06 pm (UTC)

Verily, thou speaketh the truth. ;-)
Co-Queen of Dorkinessardentdelirium on October 31st, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)
yeah, we used to get that at Tower too (the "I want a book, by an author, I don't know who, but his name starts with an 'G', I dunno what it's called, but its definitely a book..." and the "hey I heard a song on the radio that sounds like this *hums*" thing that winterswitchery mentioned)
Neverwhere: Amused Lizzie -- by eyesthatslayangelislington on October 31st, 2008 06:10 am (UTC)
I swear it's like all rational human faculty abandons people as soon as they enter a shop and become a 'customer', because they are all entirely made of Dumb. *G*
Jenamermaidrain on October 31st, 2008 01:15 am (UTC)
Welcome to the Supernatural fandom. It's full of fun and angst. ;)
Neverwhere: My cupcakes are delicious [potter/smex]angelislington on October 31st, 2008 06:11 am (UTC)
It's soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good.

There's just SO MUCH to squee over, from the woobie angst to the puppylove to the unresolved sexual tension, it's ALL BRILLIANT. Yayyyyyyyyyyyy :D
Meggytron: Jensen is Jared's - MINEdiner on October 31st, 2008 04:00 pm (UTC)
Neverwhere: But where's the gay? SRSLY WHEREangelislington on October 31st, 2008 06:06 pm (UTC)

your icon makes me wibble :D
Meggytron: DEAN PIE OMFG HEAVENdiner on October 31st, 2008 06:09 pm (UTC)
try to catch the deluge in a paper cup: colors don't run the worldprimroseburrows on October 31st, 2008 01:27 am (UTC)
How dare the French be so foreign? They should speak American like everyone else!
Neverwhere: PALIN FOR PREZangelislington on October 31st, 2008 06:14 am (UTC)
*laughs* I know right!

Anyone who doesn't speak Amurikan is Against Us and should - needs - to be bombed. To save them from being Foreign. *snort* ;-)
try to catch the deluge in a paper cupprimroseburrows on October 31st, 2008 03:04 pm (UTC)
Si, es verdad. Mais oui. Er. I mean, of course!
This is not the journal you're looking for: pink in a slightly special wayladynyks on October 31st, 2008 12:30 pm (UTC)
You need the cartoon icon of a loonie customer coming to the bookshop looking for a book. "I think it was blue."
Ashfaeashfae on October 31st, 2008 03:56 pm (UTC)
*gigglesnort* Oh, that's classic.

The story about the woman who was pissed because all the books on dinosaurs had drawings and she wanted photos remains my favorite. ;)

With bookstores and libraries, the joke is the patrons who come in saying "I'm looking for a book. It had a red cover." What's worrying is WHEN YOU FIND IT.